I suffer from chronic bitch face. What is chronic bitch face, you ask? Bitch face is an affliction that makes you look like you're angry and as if you're thinking 'Don't even come near me, lest you incite my rage', even when you are perfectly happy and content.
I've been a chronic bitch face sufferer since I was a kid. How do I know I have this unfortunate affliction? It's because there is rarely a day that goes by that I don't have random strangers tell me to 'Cheer up, it's not that bad!' when I'm simply out and about, minding my own business.
For the longest time, I would wonder what in the hell these random people were talking about because I was not in a bad mood. After a while I realized that they were just reacting to how my face looks. Even my husband, who knows me better than anyone, will sometimes ask me what's wrong when there is absolutely nothing wrong at all. For a while I tried to consciously change the expression on my face to avoid the problem, but I quickly learned that that's like trying to write with your left hand when you're right handed; it just doesn't work.
I've often wondered what would happen if I told these random strangers that tell me to cheer up that I appreciate their concern but I'm actually in a good mood and that's just how my face looks but thanks for noticing? The problem is that would make for some awkward encounters and if there is anything I hate more than random stranger interactions, it's awkward random stranger interactions. So instead, I just emit a small chuckle, smile at the random stranger and go on my merry way. I figure that if nothing else, they might think they actually made me smile and that they had a small part in cheering up a person that was in a bad mood. Even though I wasn't in a bad mood in the first place. My face just looks like that, I swear.